Sometimes I reflect back to my single days when I had all the spare time in the world.
I used to crash on the couch and have epic marathons of Game of Thrones, or try to beat a Halo game in one sitting. Or I’d go out with the guys on Friday nights and won’t come home until 3 A.M.
Ah. To be single again.
Having a kid changes things completely, of course. I have the joy of raising my little own Mini Me. My daughter’s smile totally puts a goofy grin on my face. Hearing her baby laughter melts my heart and completely makes my day.
On the other hand, with most of my time at home taken up with child care, now I crave for my spare time like nothing else.
There are few things as influential on your happiness and success as having the freedom to do the things you love. To be able to have this freedom, there needs to be a freeing up of spare time.
Since I became a dad ten months ago, I constantly looked for creative ways to find more spare time to do the activities that I love to do on my own: reading, writing, and working out.
There are actually tons of ways to squeeze spare time out of a 24 hour day of a new dad.
Here are four of them.
1. Wake up a couple of hours earlier.
Waking up earlier is probably the simplest thing any new dad can do to have a couple of hours to himself. I started waking up between 5-6 A.M. each day to do my own thing while my wife and daughter were still sleeping.
It’s not that hard once you get used to it. I found the optimal amount of sleep that I needed (6.5 hours) and just went to bed a bit earlier. Also, I was excited to get out of bed because I knew that I would have 1-2 hours all to myself.
2. Negotiate a spare time rota with the wife.
There are patches of time throughout the week (especially on the weekend) where a couple can create a rota for child care. This frees up hours of spare time for both husband and wife.
I would negotiate with my wife certain times when I would take care of our daughter solo, and vice versa. This allowed us to go out with friends, pursue our own pet projects, or take a well-deserved nap.
It’s good to reach an understanding with your significant other so that you both have protected spare time to stay happy.
3. Find a workaround with work.
Everyone’s work situation is totally different. But I believe that anyone can figure out a way to work around work hours to free up some spare time.
One thing that I did was take advantage of a pretty good benefit at my workplace: a 10 week parental leave, which I have actually just started. It’s pretty good—I get to play stay-at-home-dad for a while.
Even getting into work a half hour early and leaving a half hour early may free up some time by avoiding rush hour traffic. Telecommuting is an option for some men. Get creative with how you can fulfill your work obligations and free up some spare time.
4. Use dead time creatively.
Dead time is all of the wasted time that goes down the drain when standing in line, waiting for the bus, or getting stuck in traffic.
Dead time can be transformed into spare time, if you get creative about it.
I take a subway and a bus to get to work (I can’t stand driving to work in Toronto). I use that time as my reading time–I can plow through a book a week by just cracking it open when I’m in transit. There are guys I know who listen to audiotapes in the car, or always have something educational to listen to or read that is loaded up on a smart phone.
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Although spare time is important to keep you happy, time with your little tyke is super super important as well. This baby thing is a balancing act, but it is one that is eminently doable.
Give yourself and your wife enough spare time to keep yourselves happy, but it’s always good to keep in mind the primary focus has got to be the kid. Time with your baby is definitely time well spent!